On Life, Love and Learning

So, I’m old enough to have experienced quite a fair bit of experiences in my life, enough to make me a wise enough person to know my own self worth, and all that. What comes to mind is that YouTube commercial (don’t know if you’ve seen it), that one that talks about girls and how they are very confident about themselves when they are younger, but as soon as they hit that stage of their life, because of outside influences they are very vulnerable and self conscious, meaning that if we were to not think of them as weak and fragile and not derail them, they might have a better self image. It is usually because they are hitting puberty and there are so many changes going on physically and emotionally. This goes for guys, too but usually girls are just looked on as weaker and less able to handle all the rougher physical activity that men can do (not necessarily true), but because girls at their age of puberty are at a fragile state in their lives where they are just experiencing their descent into womanhood, and with it bring a range of different emotions and feelings that are just inexplicable.

However, if you teach your child to be headstrong and upfront from the start, there’s no saying what the possibilities are. Teach them about the world, how it can be, challenges they may face! That being said though, every child is different and has their own unique and special qualities. Me, for example, I’m very particular (well, as I got older I learned to relax a little) about things-but I guess you could also say I’m an organized person haha and I always have to at least know where things are-I try having one spot for them and always keeping them there, because it’s very frustrating when you can’t find something when you need it. I guess the key is getting to know how your child is and skillfully teaching them in a way they will understand, and do the best they can do, and then as they venture off and start their descent into puberty, they will experience many different circumstances, but through these they will become a strong individual, and have a strong foundation because of your endeavors.

Depending on the methods you use with your child, they will either be willing to open up to you, or they will not. If you’re open minded and do not give the impression that you will be outraged at something that you may not particularly agree with, there will be more of a chance that they will open up to you. I’m no parent, but I’ve read many articles and I can see the validity behind it all…and it makes sense, too! Obviously anyone would be more willing to open up to people who do not judge, or act irrationally to what they have to say.

Everybody is different, and no one person experiences life exactly the same way and it’s always interesting to me when parent’s try to protect their children from harm as much as they can, not wanting them to go down the same path they might have taken when they potentially think that their child is going to. Like I said, every child is different, and some obey their parent’s every command, whereas others will find their own ways through their life, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing (although maybe a little scary for parents at first), as long as they’re on the right road ahead and not headed towards destruction 😉

I feel that I personally struggle a little with some things-it’s healthy to write it out here! That’s what these are for. We all go through different phases, circumstances, and periods in our lives, so yeah. In my family, for the last few years or so maybe we’ve all grown up and gone our owns ways, and we’ve all become very distant, despite living in the same house. Also, I don’t really know how this happened, or why but my younger sister and I aren’t very close, at all. There have been times in the past where she’s openly said in front of friends that she has no respect for me, and I was shocked and didn’t know she felt that way. I don’t know the reasoning behind it, or anything, and I also secretly am pained by it, so don’t feel like asking why she can’t stand me (according to my mom). It hurts too much knowing that, let alone asking and finding out why. I mean, we do nice things for each other, give each other gifts and stuff but that’s it. when we’re out at places, we act civilized and people might think we’re close, but in reality, we’re perfect strangers to each other. Her and my younger brother are more close, so at least she has someone to talk to about it. I’m also close with my younger brother and whenever he comes over (he lives downtown) I always find myself in a really happy, natural state. He gets me :). One of my friends always says that things might be painful and you might cry, but sometimes you have to do what you have to do to break barriers and open doors, to communicate how you feel and all that. She often will be out late with friends and for a long time I had no idea where she actually was, but I saw a few pictures she sent on snapchat and it seemed fine enough, so I was assured it was all good. This is something I do struggle with, her being out late all those times. My moms says, too, that she needs to spend more time with the family because her friends won’t always be there, so yeah. I hate to admit it but these are some of the reasons I don’t want to have kids, it’s a scary thing! However, all that being said I can see small improvements in the relationship between me and my sister, forming. I feel like she might have just gone through a rough time in her late teens and maybe just expressed it in a bratty way 😛 haha! All good.

Also, lately I’ve just been having the need to be alone most of the time, at least at home. I have this mental thing that when my mom tries to help me out I feel like she doesn’t think I can do something on my own (I’m pushing myself to snap out of this and realizing she’s only trying to help) but I guess lately I feel like I just prefer it on my own, naturally haha because that way I don’t have to deal with talking to people in the morning, when I don’t feel like talking, or having someone get angry at me for being rude. I’ve just been on a weird swing of thoughts lately, and like one of my friends says, it could just be the age, but yeah. I haven’t been wanting to be around people at home, either. This may be due to recent circumstances that have occurred, and just me trying to deal with it. There have been many times where my parents have told me how they felt on things, where I might have felt differently, but essentially they might have been right all along and all that, but it was one of those things where they gave hypothetical scenarios so I couldn’t know for sure. Now, I’m just left feeling that I will never discuss the matter of a guy with them ever again, or even want to open up to one for that matter. I’m fine with being friends, but never do I want to go beyond that, anytime soon.

But all that aside, I know I’m not ready, haha so that will happen when it happens, but not anytime soon. I guess like my mom says I should work on family first. 🙂

Like Colette said in her channel, you will break hearts and you will have yours broken, but this is all apart of life. I’m a lot better with my parents than I was at first, when it all happened. They are my parents and I should never treat them really badly, I know that. I just have a hard time with expressing myself.

Wow, long post!

Goodnight and Happy Thanksgiving.




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